『ダイエット』 Seijika – YO. IT’S BREAKDOWN.

March 2, 2009

Hey everyone. It’s about time for a Review! Last one I did was the very first post I made. What insanity. This is usually because I feel like I don’t  have enough to say about a game to turn it into one. Or possibly because I’m just lazy. Probably the latter. Small update to explain the non PlayStation game bit. FFIX Disc 3 is scratched and won’t let me proceed past a certain point. So until that’s been fixed I played a bunch of Breakdown, for the HugeBox. I eventually beat it. This game had a Unfinished Rate of over 80% when I started, and all I heard about this game was that it was obscure, it was good, and it was hard. Is it really? Let’s find out.

If you are human, you are not ready.

If you are human, you are not ready for Breakdown.

Breakdown starts you off waking up in a white room with scientists talking about you. You are Derrick Cole. You have no memories. Suddenly, a woman who is strikingly similar to Ada teleports in (with cherry blossoms!) and freaks you out by shaking you and yelling at you. You must go with her to save the world, which is under attack from strange superhuman beings called T’lan who are immune to bullets and have immense physical strength and ability. Derrick disocovers he has similar powers, and must stop he T’lan threat by beating them down with his mitts. The story of course unfolds much more past that. Breakdown is different than other video games in that it actually has a pretty good story. I was quite surprised seeing how games are good to just get away with a mediocre story. Breakdown pulls its story off well and fits everything together nicely, even giving an open-ended ending for a sequel without much groaning.

The main characters in the game are dandy. The protagonist Derrick is your average hero trying his best to save everyone. He looks completely average (bordering tool) which gives him much more of an underdog appeal despite having super powers. Derrick also has the best jump in any game: the Thrust Jump, where he does a big pelvic thrust in mid-air. Derrick Cole, thrusting his way to victory. Alex, or “Ada” if that’s easier, is mostly useless in combat despite being able to flip all over the place. She’s that classic female character who you constantly get outta jams. Finally there’s the main antagonist Solus, who is a great villain. Somewhat resembling Dante if Dante was naked except for some crazy black crystal pants and gloves. He speaks in a robotic, simplistic voice which makes all that more sinister. All around awesome character.



Now for one of my favorite parts: audio! The voice over job was done…okay. On a technical level, it was not synced very well with character’s movements creating some strange motions. On a professional level most characters speak awkwardly, with Derrick sounding like a total tool. Alex’s voice actress did the best job, who was pretty good. Now for the soundtrack! Fufufu, a super important aspect to a game! I enjoyed this soundtrack. It had a lot of stuff you’d expect in an action movie, which is probably what they wanted. Quick beats, techno, all that jazz. Despite it being a mainly action/sci-fi oriented game, there were a few nice creepy songs to set an eerie mood when the time called for it. Overall good muzac. Tends to cut short out of nowhere rather than fade out, but I’m not sure if that’s just the Xbox 360 being stinky at backwards compatibility. Very plausible. Curse you Microsooooft!

Shit. Just. Got. Real.

Observation: Shit just got real.

Gameplay time. This is where Breakdown stands out. Breakdown is easily the ancestor to Mirror’s Edge. It is a truly First Person FPS. Your vision is just what Derrick sees, the camera moves as his head does, etc. What also makes Breakdown quite awesome it that it’s a First Person Fighting Game. You use what nature gave you: your knuckles and your boots. You lay a beatdown on all opposition. The hand-to-hand combat is superb. With each ‘level up’ earned throughout the game, you gain more combos and additions to past combos. The game completely becomes your own as you learn the combos for yourself by playing around with combinations, you are given no “Move List”. It’s all about raw power and skill, baby. Despite the huge emphasis on melee combat, you do use guns now and again, mostly against armed foes. It is insanely tedious and a total downer. The way Derrick picks up items is also a total nuisance. You lock in on it, pick it up, look at it, then stow it. Stop being such a tool, Derrick! These things you get through though so you can stomp some more heads.

The difficulty rating is also nice and high. These days games are quite easy compared to the older stuff. Breakdown takes that mold, breaks it, reforms it into a club, then smashes it over your head. The game is definitely challenging. There are a number of fights that will take a couple tries to get down. With some perseverance and Ultra Juice though, Breakdown should be no problem to Beat. If you want to conquer Expert though, you will need a blessing from Bruce Lee. It’s rough.

Breakdown is an obscure, but sweet game. It’s rough around some of the graphical edges (though most likely just from backwards compatibility again) and suffers from a couple gameplay annoyances, but these are instantly forgotten once you’re screaming your manliest roar whilst punching T’lan warriors into oblivion. I give Breakdown…9 Solus’ out of 10!



  1. Wow, I think this was the first review that I’ve actually read the whole thing of in MONTHS. Such great descriptions! I’m a little surprised to hear that audio was the best part of the game…sure didn’t look it from the genre! I am also 1.5x more interested in the game because it seems to be full of smashing…except not really because it is difficult?!

    So uh, tl;dr: GREAT REVIEW. Dan- er, Solus looks wahoo.

  2. I remember hearing about Breakdown. I never thought of it being the ancestor to Mirror’s Edge before reading this review.

  3. Aw yeah, Breakdown.

    Glad to hear someone else enjoyed it… here’s to breaking down that ungodly high unbeaten percentage! (see what I did thar?)

  4. Nice review, this is Stuff btw. I did a review on Mirror’s Edge and loved it, so this sounds good I’ll give it a try.

    Sorry to hear about your FFIX disc not working, I’m playing it as well on disc 2. When I beat it, we should trade games, my copy is in pristine condition that I got from Goozex.

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